Comments on: Thick and Thin: a Tale of Two Sisters

By: Eileen

Eileen — Thu, 07 Aug 2014 16:35:22 +0000

I could have written this myself. I first foray into weight watchers was at age 11. I was 5-4 and 152 lbs. I was nowhere near fat. I was thick and still growing. My yoyo started then. I got up to 5-10 tall and my pre-children weight ranged from 163-209 thru 15 years of yoyo dieting starting at age 11. With pregnancies, dieting, pills, obsessive exercise, I then varied from 192-315 over 23 more years. I must have tried WW 20 times, Jenny Craig 5, Atkins, low-fat, cabbage soup diet, south beach, running thru rain or snow. You name it I did it. the weight came off but always came back. Eventually the weight would not come off anymore after years of this. I know that the perception that i was the fat one from about age 6 onward led me to the dieting yoyo for my whole life. I promised never to do such a thing to my own children. I’d rather they be a bit thick than start the dieting yoyo.
18 months ago with diabetes potentially staring me in the face and the potential for Breast Cancer reoccurrence, I bit the bullet and got gastric sleeve surgery at 295 pounds. I did not want to yoyo again. I could get 10 pounds off and it would be right back on. I needed the help of the hormone changes surgery brings that address appetite and metabolism (which 38 years of dieting screwed up). I am now 180 pounds and 26% body fat. I do strength training and spinning and am at the gym 4 times a week. I am active, walking and biking even on vacation. I walk 2 miles to and from work from the train station. I am still thick! But I am also strong!

By: meg

meg — Sat, 26 Jul 2014 09:35:19 +0000

This story is a lot like my own, with my little sister being thin, and me being thick, though I did have a minor weight problem as well. My weight problem would probably have resolved itself with puberty if I had only loved myself, and I know I wouldn’t have developed any disordered eating habits.

I am now an adult (I think) and I have finally accepted my “gut” and my thick thighs – because they are a wonderful part of me. I am healthy and in much better shape physically than when I was at my smallest size.

My binge eating disorder is under control more often than not, and I’m slowly working on figuring out certain food sensitivities (I need to avoid things like feeling bloated as that brings back feelings of hatred towards my body). Food allergies run in the family, so their support is great.

Weight loss is not on my agenda, fueling my body and eating tasty food is – and it’s very liberating to eat an entire bag of plantain chips with a whole avocado and not worry about a carb number, how many calories that was, etc.

I’ve hid away my scale as it only brings me down, and I chose to focus on how great I feel – that inevitably makes me also admire how great I look!

Beautiful people like you remind me to keep heading down this path. Thank you!

By: Long View Hill

Long View Hill — Fri, 25 Jul 2014 16:30:49 +0000

Wow. Lots of sister stories. My sister is beautiful – in a “model in a magazine” kind of way. I’ve always been a lot bigger and thought of myself as attractive but not pretty. I’ve been doing a lot of work – eating better, being active, lifting weights and changing my body. Now, I would say we are comparable, not the same, but a much more similar look and physique. It’s hard to navigate. Until recently, I didn’t realize how much I’ve built so much on that in my head. It’s hard, for sure. Thank you for writing this.

By: Kymberley

Kymberley — Fri, 25 Jul 2014 06:36:38 +0000

My sister and I are a similar height and weigh about the same but have quite different builds. I have always used her figure as my goal, with her slightly longer legs (I have a slightly longer body) and narrower hips (I am more hourglass) and where she carries body fat compared to me. Reading my first sentence to myself again, though, is like a lightbulb moment – we have quite different builds!! I will never possibly look the same as her! She has always paid me compliments and built me up, but I used to think she felt she had to say those things. But – we have quite different builds, so perhaps she has wished she had some of my attributes! Now I feel foolish for chasing the unobtainable for so long, haha '? We are both spot on

By: Kristi Joy

Kristi Joy — Thu, 24 Jul 2014 23:56:19 +0000

Wow! This hits close to home. I am not even that much bigger than my sis, (she’s about 100lbs and I’m 125lbs) but I was always the “strong”, “big-boned” one (even though I’m a dancer as well). Goes to show you can always find someone to compare yourself to and then feel badly about no matter how you look.

“But deep conditioning dies hard, and even now I can stand next to my sister (and other women who's bodies are small and thin and graceful) and feel awkward and ungraceful and huge.”

My sister is coming to visit this weekend. We are going to the beach. Even though I’m helping her with strength training and even though I’ve been cutting fat all summer, deep conditioning dies hard for sure.
Thanks for sharing. You are right.

By: B

Thu, 24 Jul 2014 23:23:14 +0000

I still feel like the fat sister. Even in high school when my sister and I wore the same size clothes, my parents would buy me a large and her a small or medium. I ran a half marathon and when the shirt was too tight, she asked if she could have it. I’ve had more than one person tell me I was the smart one and she was the pretty one. It’s weird that now I am healthier than I have ever been and stronger than I have ever been, I’m nervous about visiting family because I’m still chubby. Old habits die hard.

By: julie

julie — Thu, 24 Jul 2014 23:19:27 +0000

My sister is 5’10” and 110 lbs. I am 5’5″, and 150, on a good day (down from 215). When she was a kid, she could eat a whole pizza by herself, because she played tennis 4 hours a day. Now she runs and eats very little. Her doctor had to tell her, when she got pregnant, to start eating some fat. Most of the family was amazed that she was fertile at all. My mom eats crap all day, gains no weight. My dad watches her eat crap, gains weight. I can eat a lot more than most ex-fattys, but most of the tiny Asian women I work with can eat me under the table.

By: robyn

robyn — Thu, 24 Jul 2014 20:41:17 +0000

This really hit home for me as well. My sister and I are 20 months apart, and growing up she was never skinny, but athletic and played tons of sports. I was overweight since about age 9 (and unfortunately, she never let me forget it. Now I see that her concern was from a place of love and about health, but boy was that rough to hear at 16). In our case, though, the roles reversed in the past 4 years and she has now gained weight and I am the “skinny” sister. I’m still navigating the weird privileges this switch has bestowed upon me, but you continue to remind me that it’s not our bodies that define us!

By: Sherrie

Sherrie — Thu, 24 Jul 2014 19:46:31 +0000

THANK YOU! I can’t wait to show this to my youngest daughter. She is dealing with the same exact thing. My oldest is what you would call a “beanpole” all arms and legs and super super skinny. My youngest is just built thicker, and a little shorter. They are 13 and 11 and i tell them ALL the time they are BOTH beautiful and that doesn’t come in “one size fits all”

By: Meg

Meg — Thu, 24 Jul 2014 19:31:38 +0000

You both have beautiful bodies! I would kill for muscles like that – they’re gorgeous. The message I hope we can finally send out is that health is so much more than outward appearance, as as long we we’re wishing for something we will never (healthily) have, it doesn’t matter what we look like on the outside because we’re tortured inside. If we spent the same amount of time worrying about what goes on inside out head as we do what we look like on the outside, our daughters would grow up in a different world. Screw what society has to say about the “perfect” body – there is no such thing. Keep preachin, sister. xx Meg